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Cream: May 2008
The hotels and self-catering accommodation included in this piece
Destination details
Tuddenham Mill
High Street
Tuddenham
Nr. Newmarket
Suffolk
IP28 6SQ
Style Streamlined gourmet getaway
Setting Brink of the Suffolk Brecks
Rooms 15
Rates £195–£395, including breakfast
Smith Factor With Gordon’s delicious food confronting you at every turn (home-made biscuits in your room; jars of pickle at reception), you’ll hardly go hungry, but for a change of scene, take your pick from Newmarket’s restaurants and cafés, or head into Bury St Edmunds: Vinch Finch has a lunch-friendly range of meat and cheese plates (+44 (0)1284 765481); Maison Bleue’s fine French fare focuses on seafood (+44 (0)1284 760623); later, cosy up in Thumbelina-scale pub The Nutshell for an intimate nightcap (+44 (0)1284 764867). Get your motor running at nearby WildTracks (www.wildtracksltd.co.uk), where you can thrash all manner of vehicles, from quad bikes and karts to tanks, around challenging courses. Bury St Edmunds is not far, and is packed with browsable shops as well as hosting regular markets: there are street markets every Wednesday and Saturday, on Cornhill in the town centre; at the Corn Exchange, there’s a craft market on Wednesdays; and the first Sunday of every month sees the town’s Athenaeum fill up with bric-a-brac, antiques and collectibles.
What the Smiths say...
There’s been a mill here for close on 1,000 years, but this 18th‑century abode is thoroughly modern. About as close to Manhattan as you’ll get in Suffolk
We’re sleeping in the upper eaves of the mill, and it turns out to be a huge, double‑height, beamed barn of a bedroom, resplendent in sleek, Italian‑designed minimalism. We can’t help but wonder what the mill‑workers that used to toil their lives away here would make of our lazy-lubber weekend. Knowing that this hotel revolves around its restaurant, and wizard Scots chef Gordon McNeill, we’re thrilled it’s time for dinner. Besides, it’s a car journey to the nearest eatery, and after seeing that most of the other diners aren’t even guests, we’re keen to find out what the fuss is about. Centre stage, behind the bar, is the original waterwheel; it becomes a real showpiece by night when its full glory is illuminated by pulsating up-lights. Even patrons who take a table upstairs can peer down, through a glass floor-panel, at the mighty and beautiful machinery – lovingly restored, yet still resolutely functional.
The kitchen team doesn't disappoint, delivering inventive, courageous, witty and hearty fare – not suited to the squeamish, though: Gordon’s signature dish, ‘A Taste of the
This boutique hotel in
Ickworth
Destination details
Ickworth House
The Rotunda
Horringer
Bury St Edmunds
IP29 5QE
Style A family heirloom
Setting National Trust parkland
Rooms 27 rooms and 11 apartments.
Rates £175–£535, including breakfast. There's a two-night minimum stay at weekends.
What the Smiths say...
With impressive gates and a quarter-mile drive up to the hotel, few entrances can be grander than the one to Ickworth House. The hotel is located in the east wing of a National Trust property open to the public, and the gardens attract a steady stream of visitors from every generation. When the tourists make their way home at the end of the day, you can’t help but feel a little smug. As a guest, you get to stay behind to wine, dine and sleep over.
To a lord or a duke, this place might seem like a home from home: quaint, charming, friendly and efficient. It also has enough of a contemporary twist to keep the Wallpaper* crowd happy. Judging by the guestbook, the vast majority of those who come to stay are mainly, like us, young families from
With such a magnificent property at our disposal, we prayed the rain would stay away. The bicycles provided allowed us to explore and admire Ickworth’s 1,800-acre grounds. But the girls’ favourite part of the weekend was having a splash in the swimming pool. Though it’s charming that the rest of the hotel is steeped in history, that’s hardly what you want in this department; located in a modern annexe off the hotel, the pool is terrifically clean, with two glass walls allowing the sunshine to penetrate.
Tennis courts and stables were among the possibilities the following morning, but it was the spa that won the toss. It isn’t huge, but I enjoyed one of the best massages ever (ask for the Italian lady). It was the icing on the cake for the Mr Smith who just wanted to see how it felt to be lord of the manor for the weekend. All that was lacking was the ability to end my visit with the words ‘Bring the Bentley round will you, James?’. Maybe next time.
This boutique hotel in
Quaker Hall Barns
Destination details
Quaker Hall Barns
Quakers Hall
Haveringland
Norwich NR10 4QF
Style Contemporary rural idyll
Setting Wide-open
Sleeps Two self-catering barns. The Quaker Barn sleeps up to eight guests in two double rooms and one twin; the Hall Barn sleeps up to nine in three double bedrooms and one twin bedroom. They can be rented together, or separately.
Rates Quaker Barn: between £430 and £640 for a three-night weekend, or between £705 and £1,110 for a week. Hall Barn: between £525 and £830 for a three-night weekend or between £805 and £1,520 for a week.
Smith Factor The
Set amid the beautiful
The beauty of the
Many aspects of the Grade II listed barns have been retained, including flint stone walls and oak beams. The owner and architect Anthony Hudson has won several awards for his work on these conversions. Hall Barn was once a store for farm carts and is now ranged over two floors around a large double-height living space; the use of a translucent rain screen fills it with natural light. Quaker Barn is smaller and is formed from the marriage of two separate farm buildings. It has a more intimate, cosy atmosphere.
The original use of the buildings lends some rather quirky aspects to the barns – the master bedroom in the Hall Barn has a small alcove bed, while the twin room in the Quaker Barn has a sleeping platform up a somewhat precarious ladder. The properties are highly versatile and suitable for different groups, particularly families. The interior tones are bright and neutral with flint walls, wood panelling and soft fabrics adding a wonderful contrast of shades and textures.
The focal points of the barns are the living areas, with their cosy wood-burning stoves with views through sliding doors which draw the eye to the garden and fields beyond. The large oak dining table is perfect for a dinner party or more informal meal, and the table on the garden terrace is the ideal venue for a barbecue on a fine summer’s day. You can prepare meals in the fully equipped kitchen using fresh produce from the orchard or herb garden right outside. However, the atmosphere is so peaceful and relaxed that you may want to arrange for caterers to prepare everything for you so you don’t need to lift a finger.
Reviewed by Mr & Mrs Smith
Strattons
Destination details
Strattons
Ash Close
Swaffham
Norfolk
PE37 7NH
Style Eco-friendly eclectic
Setting The Brecks in
Rooms 10
Rates £150-£225, including breakfast.
Smith factor Hunt for bargains at the antiques market and auction in Swaffham on Saturdays. Itteringham is a picturesque
What the Smiths say...
Tucked away off the high street of the cute market town of Swaffham in Norfolk, this boutique hotel is in fact set in a beautiful Queen Anne Palladian villa set in its own close. Chickens roaming the front lawn were the first to greet us, followed by the warmly welcoming owners, Vanessa and Les. Once checked in, we were ushered back out onto the drive and taken across to a converted outhouse set apart from the hotel – our home for the weekend.
An appealing mixture of modern and ethnic decor, and split between two floors, the Opium Suite is so much of a haven even the chooks were determined to cop a look inside. Downstairs is the sitting room, with a walk-in wet room behind glass bricks (first-time-awayers may find themselves waving goodbye to a little of that mystery). As for the bath, we found it standing at the foot of the bed upstairs – fabulously unconventional. If you’re planning a detox, this is the retreat for you; everything is as organic and eco-friendly as possible, even the bubble-bath. We had other plans though, and a complimentary bottle of
After familiarising ourselves with the bar situation (for the rooms without minibars, it’s located in a dresser in one of the drawing rooms and is run on an honesty basis) we were ready for a wander through Swaffham before dinner. There, we were treated to an unexpected auction: lots of country folk in wellies, Barbours and flat caps crowded around a hoary old man with hub caps and tools spread out on tarpaulins in front of him – all advertised in that incomprehensible auctioneer patter. There were also some great cheese and fish stalls at the market, which got us in the mood for our supper.
We moved into the hotel's cosy restaurant, where a mural of an Italian summer country scene, small windows, low ceilings and church candles create a pretty, cosy feel. It is wonderfully intimate, and thus not a place to discuss anything delicate (although after a while we became oblivious – who could resist so many great half bottles of white?). The food is hearty all-organic English fare, served in contemporary style: home foods with a creative twist.
Dinner was a hard act to follow, but breakfast was just as impressive. Exceptionally tasty eggs, bacon, mushrooms and delicious eco coffee in huge mugs set us up for our walk to the nearby beach (and soothed the consequences of champagne in the bath in our bedroom the night before). And wow, what a beach. Who knew beaches like this existed in our Blighty? Sand-dunes and a long, flat expanse to fly our stunt kite from – it’s so massive it feels like no one else is around, apart from the birds. Surrounded by the Holkham Salt Marshes Wildlife Reserve, we saw thousands of
This boutique hotel in
Destination details
Hotel du Vin & Bistro
Trumpington Street
Cambridge
CB2 1QA
Trumpington Street
Setting Old university rooms
Rooms 41
Rates £135–£325 midweek; £145–£325 at weekends. Includes taxes. Breakfast is £9.95 for Continental; £13.50 for a full English.
Smith factor The hotel is enviably located by a string of
What the Smiths say...
‘Er, yeah,’ she said. There are more positive replies I could have hoped for but, as proposals go, it was far from a disaster. She loved the ring and agreed to become my Mrs Smith. Would she be equally happy with my choice of celebration venue –
It had to be
The hotel’s layout gets some getting used to – this attractive Victorian terrace is a combination of what were once halls of residence and Cambridge University’s education faculty – and navigating the maze of corridors would, we imagine, prove a feat after an evening in the bar. We wend our way down to the basement bar, a hobbit-house collection of nooks and niches that puts me in the mood for a whisky. There’s an extensive selection, but I decide to opt for a modest Laphroaig rather than break into a fifty this early in the evening. Mrs Smith is less sure about how to approach the cocktail menu and asks the barman for advice. ‘I’m after something fruity but not too sweet; definitely not creamy.’ A nod of understanding, then, moments later, a twinkling Belvedere is planted in front of her. The verdict: ‘that’s exactly what I wanted.’
We have no qualms then about putting ourselves in the hands of one of the hotel’s four sommeliers at dinner. I’ll come clean – my understanding of wine extends only to having drank a lot of it, and knowing that there’s never an excuse for pinot grigio. But with 550 bottles in the cellar beneath, it’s reassuring to know I have an expert to guide me.
His choices are bold and brilliant. He teams my smoked duck, walnut and raspberry salad with a zesty red, and unexpectedly yokes a roast partridge to a deep and honeyed white. Both courses are a delight, and Mrs Smith is equally pleased with her scallops draped in Gruyere, and a lamb shoulder so tender that the meat practically gambols from the bone. When the cheese waiter arrives tableside with a vast tray of softs and hards, ewes’ and goats’, blues and bries, my betrothed spends the next half hour matching each bite to the kind of narrative detail that would put Dickens to shame. Once the cheese tour has ended, we head back to our room to do what every couple should on the first day of their engagement: swig champagne in twin baths while watching DVDs of 24 on a giant plasma screen.
This boutique hotel in
Destination details
Cliff Barns
Narford Road
Narborough
Norfolk
PE32 1HZ
Narford Road
Style Wild West
Setting East Anglian flatlands
Sleeps Self-catering barn sleeping 18–20 in eight bedrooms, including an adult-sized four-bunk room. There is also a teepee in the garden that sleeps eight.
Rates From £2,740 for a three night weekend or a weekly rate from £3,940
Smith factor The owners, interior designer Shaun Clarkson and set designer Russell Hall, have let their creative talents run riot with a look that they describe as ‘rancho deluxe’. In 2002, they bought a set of derelict cow sheds and then spent two years creating their dream property almost from scratch. Featuring antique French mirrors, outsized lamps, cowhide chairs, wagon-wheel chandeliers and the odd moose head, Cliff Barns has an irresistible sense of fun – The High Chaparral in glorious technicolor. Furnished with an artful mismatch of styles that creates ideal party spaces, the lounge and dining room are large enough for all guests to relax in comfort by the river-stone fireplaces. It's ideal for a quiet weekend away with 17 of your nearest and dearest hedonistic friends and relations.
What the Smiths say...
Part psychedelic Wild West-style hacienda, part baronial hunting lodge, Cliff Barns is not what you’d expect to find in the wilds of
The eclectic decor has been applied to the eight individual bedrooms which contain such unbridled quirkiness as floral wallpaper, chintzy curtains, silver birch branch beds and riding saddles; there’s even a ‘bunk house’ room with four adult-sized beds. Not that Cliff Barns is designed for the tough frontiersman; when it comes to comforts, the property is totally uncompromising. Console your inner cowboy with the knowledge that Davy Crockett would have indulged himself with soft white dressing gowns, handmade toiletries and luxurious wet rooms if only they’d been available on the
A central, enclosed courtyard with its sauna and hot tub enhances the atmosphere of seclusion and hedonism where you almost expect to hear ‘Housemates, this is Big Brother.’ This is the perfect setting for a barbecue on a sunny day and it’s also safe and secure for children to play. Cliff Barns is surrounded by open lawns, and in summer it’s possible to pitch teepees on the grass, either for a daytime powwow or as accommodation for extra guests (in true party style, there’s no limit on the number of guests allowed at the house).
The house is kitted out with a fully equipped, state-of-the-art kitchen including a caterers’ fridge and a separate drinks fridge large enough for at least 100 bottles. You can be looked after by Kay the chef, who will prepare a barbecue in the courtyard or a dinner party at the 18-seat dining table. Cliff Barns has hosted events for up to 150 people, so pretty much anything is possible – even a bucking bronco for your own impromptu rodeo.
With the same attention to detail that they have put into the decor, Russell and Shaun have thought of everything you might need, with golf clubs and an almost inexhaustible supply of board games to hand. If you find you’ve arrived at the house without that all-important glitter-covered Stetson or feather boa then simply make a beeline for Cliff Barn’s wonderful dressing-up box before any children in the house beat you to it.
Many guests are unable to tear themselves away from the house during their stay, but the peaceful
Reviewed by Mr & Mrs Smith