Anantara Qasr al Sarab Desert Resort

As we collapse into the car at Abu Dhabi airport, I have my doubts about Mr Smith’s promise of a dreamy getaway amid scenes of stunning natural beauty. Our hotel is meant to be buried deep in the world’s largest sand desert; a place romantically known as the Empty Quarter. But as we whizz past the fluorescent lights and mega high-rises of Abu Dhabi city, the name seems frankly delusional. Can it really be true that somewhere out in the night there’s an isolated, palatial resort?

Fast forward a couple of hours, and all doubts are banished. Up ahead, rising from the sand – if you’ll excuse the cliché – like a glittering mirage, is Anantara Qasr al Sarab Desert Resort. It’s a desert fort straight out of Lawrence of Arabia, with torches and huge turrets marking the threshold. Not everyone comes by road, though. As we sweep through the enormous central courtyard, a couple of helicopters come into view.

The welcome is seamless, even though it’s almost midnight. Incredibly friendly staff soon have us sipping mint tea in the library, with mounds of cushions around us and elaborate lanterns overhead. We have a convoy to get to our room, with one golf buggy for us and another close behind transporting our (embarrassingly mismatched) bags. Mr Smith is firmly back in my good books – I feel like royalty. Which is no surprise, as it transpires. The Abu Dhabi Royals’ personal pavilion is just round the corner, and this land used to be theirs.

As we wind down the path towards our room, our driver points out a dark shadow rising up into the night sky. Apparently it’s the biggest sand dune in the area, and he says we must climb it at sunrise. Mr Smith looks excited, while I silently ponder whether walking on sand counts as exercise. The buggy ride unveils more of the hotel, which is almost a small village. A tumble of walls, balconies and courtyards stretch out on either side of the main tower, meandering for a mile. I’d been worried that its size might make Anantara Qasr Al Sarab feel like a cruise ship plonked in the desert, but the layout is perfect. Each room has its own private outdoor area or balcony, and everything is built low – it’s all very discreet and quiet, with four or five rooms in each cluster.

The room is fabulous. A wall of glass looks out to the desert, which by this time is a sheet of stars. All fears of a crystal-and-gold-leaf explosion evaporate as we take in the beautiful dark wood, soft white linen and twinkling lights. Outside there is a shaded chillout area and lawn, surrounded by dovecotes. Even though we’ve booked the smallest room on offer, the bath is big enough for a harem; a private hammam, with bath salts provided daily and genie-like glass bottles with cork stoppers for shampoo. There’s also a walk-in monsoon shower, and double sinks, all set in sandy stone, creamy marble and dark wood. It would be entirely feasible to spend a week just hanging out in here.

Famished from our trip, we order room service and tuck into the first of many rounds of mixed grill and moutabel (their take on hummus). It’s delicious. This isn’t a hotel that cuts corners on quality, and the food is no exception. There’s wagyu steak at the rooftop restaurant, and all the pool options are pretty good, too. Which is lucky, given the only alternative food option is slaying a stray camel. My personal favourite of the many dining options is the made-to-order crumpet stand at breakfast. Heavenly, and just one part of a giant buffet selection that stretches from eggs/pancake territory to a full range of Middle Eastern meze.

As we wake up on our first morning, the wall of darkness has transformed into the most heart-stopping view imaginable. Pink-tinged sand swoops all the way to the horizon, and the sky is blue and enormous. Make no mistake – this is the reason to come to Anantara Qasr Al Sarab. The view brims with romance and adventure, a fitting comeback to any cynics that argue Emirates escapes have less soul. The scenery dominates every room in the hotel, and the pool is built right on the edge of the desert, so that you can hop out of the water, climb over the wall and head out into the sand. The landscape is unimaginably vast: as I struggle to the top of the nearest dune, with Mr Smith practically dragging me up, it is impossible to comprehend how anyone could traverse the full length of the desert. In our whole time at Anantara Qasr Al Sarab, I meet only one creature who might be up to the task. Shaheen.

To tell the truth, I’ve lost my heart to Shaheen. He’s got beautifully dark eyes, long lashes and a very toothy grin. He also has two humps and gigantic feet, which make him very well equipped for desert life. The activities at Anantara Qasr Al Sarab range from falconry to desert safari, but they’re the one time during our stay when it all feels a bit touristy, so in general we steer clear. The sunset camel ride is too much to resist, though, and Shaheen and I bond as we cross the blushing dunes and head for the horizon.

Over the next few days we try out the spa (serendipitous), dune bashing in four by fours (terrifying), and open-air dinner out in the desert (unspeakably romantic). It is all idyllic, and the staff we meet are attentive and thoughtful. But on our last night, with all the options on offer, all we want to do is head out to the dunes and watch the sun go down. Because, really, it’s all about the view.