Twenty years from now you will only regret the hot tubs you didn’t sit in and the scones you couldn’t eat in a hotel bed on a Monday morning. Go ahead and throw caution to the wind and stay Sunday night because life is short and hotel sheets always feel better than the bed threads you have at home (what is their secret?!). If you need inspiration, Stylist has teamed up with Mr & Mrs Smith to round up 30 boutique hotels worthy of a long weekend and they’ve even thrown in extras, such as dinner, breakfast and late check-out. If it’s your get-out-of-work excuse you’re worried about, we’ve got you covered. Here are 10 things to tell your boss so you don’t have to head into the office.
1 If you live in Sydney, Australia, say that you accidentally flew to Sydney, Nova Scotia. If you live in Essex, say you accidentally flew to Las Vegas. Landing on the wrong continent should buy you a few extra days.
2 Remind your boss about your initial job interview and how you said your only weakness is that you work too hard. Tell her you’ve finally overcome your weakness. Hooray!
3 Explain that you need another day by the pool to conduct ‘research’ for the company. Be sure to use quotes around ‘research’ so your boss knows you have a sense of humour. Expect a promotion and raise within the next month.
4 Referencing colonoscopies has been proven to make employers feel uncomfortable 78 per cent of the time and works as an excuse 99 per cent of the time.
5 Tell the truth, but promise your boss you’ll think of him fondly as you soak in the tub. This will prove how thoughtful and loyal you are.
6 Say, ‘Wait, the company doesn’t celebrate [X holiday*]?! I thought we had the day off!’ *Do a quick Google search to fill in the blank – it’s bound to be National Scrambled Eggs Day or Global Mismatched Socks Awareness Week.
7 Cover one arm in oatmeal and text a picture to your boss with the message ‘RASH!’ Enjoy an extra day at your boutique hotel fishing, riding and dining at the Michelin-starred restaurant. Relax and try not to think about the fact that you’ll probably have to keep some oatmeal on your arm for 2-5 days after returning to the office to keep up the ruse.
8 Simply text your boss a picture of a spider. Everyone hates spiders, so he/she will ask no further questions.
9 Claim that you have the song ‘Who Let the Dogs Out?’ by Baha Men stuck in your head and to keep from spreading it to the rest of the office you should stay in isolation… in a hand-carved super-king Italian sleigh-bed in Manchester.
10 Thirteen words: I have jury duty, the flu, a dentist appointment AND a flat tyre.
Featured image is a Hilly Hut at The Fish Hotel in the Cotswolds