The Gore, London, UK

If it’s all-singing, all-dancing opulence you’re after, then the Venus Room – one of 10 feature rooms at this stylish Victorian hotel in Kensington – does it with aplomb. And with jazz hands. Camper than a flock of flamingos in feather boas, the room is worth checking into for its bathroom alone: statues of Venus and Adonis peer down at you while you’re soaking in the bath, and a kitsch frieze of the goddess of love riding a chariot adorns one wall. The bed itself, an ornate four-poster with a glittering filigree headboard beneath scarlet and gold-drapes, used to belong to Judy Garland. Fabulous. Mr and Mrs Smith – or, indeed, Mr and Mr Smith – will definitely have a feeling they’re not in Kansas anymore…

Can Verru, Ibiza, Spain

A recent addition to our Smith & Friends collection, Can Verru is an enormous Gaudí-esque villa set in extensive, orchard-filled grounds, and is a favourite of Kylie Minogue’s. If you should be so lucky to get your partner to this idyllic corner of the Balearics, then make sure you baggsie the main bedroom in the separate Moroccan-style cottage for yourselves, before any of your friends get a look at it. The bed's certainly worth fighting for. Climb over a sinuous Sabina-wood log, through an Arabic-style arch and into an enormous space fitted with a soft, custom-made mattress, and filled with crimson bedsheets and Moorish decorations. Harem roleplay, anyone?

Gallery Hotel Art, Florence, Italy

Book into this classic hotel’s Penthouse Suite Palazzo Vecchio and you’re guaranteed to whip your Mrs into a romantic Firenze. A wonderfully old-fashioned terrace, lined with terracotta tiles and dotted with contemporary blond wood and cream leather furniture, offers panoramic views over the rooftops and church towers of this beautiful city. That would be more than enough for most people. But you can also look forward to lying on the huge, outdoor futon bed, from which you can see Florence's famous Duomo, Giotto’s belltower, and the Palazzo Vecchio. Fingers crossed, there'll be nothing but blue skies ahead…

Lion Sands, Ivory Lodge, South Africa

There’s no need to beat around the bush when whisking your loved one off on a leopard-spotting, lion-stalking safari to the Kruger National Park. Simply book into Lion Sands, Ivory Lodge, and you'll have the choice of six luxury villas from which to spot the Big Five. However, ask for the villa closest to the river – which provides the most privacy – and you’ll gain access to perhaps the most romantic bed in the veld. Lie beneath the diaphanous drapes of its canopy, and watch the sort of animals you usually only see stuffed on elderly colonels’ walls gathering beside the water to drink.

Pool House, Wester Ross, Scotland, UK

Those expecting tartan counterpanes and shortbread fingers on the bedside table are in for a surprise at this Scottish boutique hotel. The spirit of the Indian subcontinent has somehow found its way to Ross-shire, and interiors based on Maharajahs’ palaces seem to be all the Raj here. The Nairana Suite, a huge area with two bedrooms, two bathrooms and an enormous seating area, is home to the sort of antique bed you’d usually only see in a museum. Beautifully painted landscape miniatures, framed in floral wreaths, stud the enamelled canopy, and tiny inlaid pieces of mirrored glass sparkle like stars in a clear Rajasthani sky.

Dar Darma, Marrakech, Morocco

A new addition to Mr & Mrs Smith’s Marrakech collection, Dar Darma is a quirky private riad in the heart of the Medina that combines traditional Arabic design with striking, contemporary interiors. The huge Red Suite – a quiet retreat from the most bustling part of this mediaeval North African city – houses a bed that will certainly appeal to the more spiritually minded couple. Accessed through an 18th-century zouak arch, the carved wooden bed is situated in a former prayer nook lined with dark wood panelling, and points its incumbents’ heads in the direction of Mecca. Very Moorish.

Charlton House, Northeast Somerset, UK

The Mulberry-swathed, classic environs of Charlton House are the ideal backdrop for a spot of old-school courting, and all 25 of this boutique hotel's rooms rack up high scores on the Ridiculously Romantic scale. The South Wing room, though, offers a four-poster bed constructed from an original Elizabethan fireplace, so you can take your wench or squire a-bed, and tumble merrily beneath a sombre panelled canopy and an ornately carved – and incredibly beautiful – 16th-century headboard.

Ca's Xorc, Mallorca, Spain

This 18th-century finca quite rightly plays up its wonderful outside spaces: sun-dappled olive groves, infinity pool with mountain views, gardens bountiful as a Kew hothouse… You get the idea. But a holiday with your loved one is about more than beautiful scents and balm for the eyes – it's also time to reconnect and rediscover what brought you together in the first place. And you won’t find many finer and more tranquil places to do this than in Ca's Xorc’s Rooftop Deluxe Room, which offers idyllic panoramic views of mountains and sea. The kingsize bed, clad in soothing white linen and lying beneath sloping rustic beams, is where Claudia Schiffer spent the night when she celebrated her 30th birthday at the hotel. Maybe don’t tell Mr Smith that.

Ca Maria Adele, Florence, Italy

Venice and Valentine’s Day have more in common than the letter 'V'. Both ooze romance in that slightly over-the-top, fluffy pink heart sort of way, which we all love to indulge in sometimes. Step outside this baroque gem of a hotel, and you’ll find gondolas floating along the adjacent canal and all those twisting alleyways where so many have proposed on a whim. Escape from all the other people admiring the glory of Venice in Ca Maria Adele’s top-floor suite, overlooking Giudecca island and the church of Madonna della Salute. Here, you can happily divide your time between lounging à deux in the kingsize bed, or doing the same in the African wood-covered Jacuzzi right next to it. Aqua plus amore equals perfetto.

Drakes Hotel, Brighton, UK

Located on the first floor of this luxurious Regency townhouse, room 104 has to be the finest bedroom in Brighton. It certainly has the largest bed: unless you or your partner is a particularly lanky basketball player, or has an overactive pituitary gland, there’s no way you’ll even come close to impacting on its seven-foot width. From your vast expanse of mattress (or from the bath, if you prefer), you'll also have impressive views of Brighton Pier and the English Channel through floor-to-ceiling windows. Slip between the Egyptian cotton sheets and the luxurious duck-down duvet, and make the most of all that extra space…